Why is there a stigma against men who go down on women?

Is it a machismo thing?

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Advice

Hyper masculinity that was encouraged from about mid-80s . Wasn’t always this way. See Williams and Bedasse “Night Food” from 1952.

With lines like:

>This food needs no knife and fork,>>how can any human be so dark.>>The food is right here in the bed,>>come here man make me scratch your head.

Oddly enough I the Heptones’ 1976 album of the same name doesn’t cover this song.

Advice

Good to know. I thought it was only because of Jamaican pop culture. Like Vybz cartel perpetuating it in his music and because he is a top artiste people idolize him and follow what his lyrics say…like with bleaching and washing your face with cake soap and gay bashing Vybz cartel also sings about it being right for men to receive oral but not reciprocate it for the woman and people follow this

Advice

> Hyper masculinity that was encouraged from about mid-80s

You think a notorious reputation for being one of the most steadfast, unruly and rebellious colonial islands in the entire Caribbean came from nowhere? From handing the British army its first ever defeat in the 1700’s to today, Jamaican back BEEN strong. Bow fi wha? Jamaica just built different. Who wan suck, dat a dem business

Advice

Good question.

It’s ironic that there’s this stigma against it, and even dancehall lyrics perpetuate it, yet the same dancehall lyrics 100% support fellatio (oral sex performed on a man).

Apparently there was once this stigma against homosexuals, and apparently they performed oral on each other… Then it was a thing to assume that oral is for gay people, so there was this stigma around it… That’s what I read somewhere..yes it’s very stupid.

There’s also this thing that men who go down on women are “battyman”.. that makes no sense to me, but here’s how I think that started:

Men sometimes love beating their chests about how they get to use women, without having to return the favor… Maybe a man felt insecure about his performance after not going down, that he started calling other people gay because he never wanted to feel like a bum.. or they’re so caught up in their “machismo” that they don’t think they should go down and please the woman..stupid I know

On another note, (don’t ask me why this entered me and my grandma’s conversation) my grandma once made reference to oral sex being basically a horrendous act… Many oldheads think oral sex is wrong and nasty, many of my male friends get really defensive (and I think they’re insecure) when the topic comes up..

I’m 18 for age reference

Advice

> Apparently there was once this stigma against homosexuals,

There still is a stigma. Though much less than in the early 90s.

> Apparently there was once this stigma against homosexuals, and apparently they performed oral on each other… Then it was a thing to assume that oral is for gay people, so there was this stigma around it… That’s what I real somewhere..yes it’s very stupid.

Not true. The whole “nuh suck pussy” stigma came a about around the early 80s, when when sex became more focused on pain through penetration. Any forms of (normal people consider) lovemaking was considered for softies and sissies.

This, combined with the 90s Rasta revival, with Capleton and the House of Nyahbinghi’s Old Testament anti-feminism and and dietary laws, put an end to all suckling of pussy for about 4 decades.

> There’s also this thing that men who go down on women are “battyman”.. that makes no sense to me, but here’s how I think that started:

Nope - yuh just suck pussy. Simple. And are banned from all bars, smoking of chalice with friends, running of boat, etc.

Advice

All Jamaican men eat pussy, they just never admit it. if they are with a Canadian, European, Asian or American girl, they are eating it. Most women expect to be eaten.I once had a jamaican lady tell me it was nasty to eat pussy although she had no problem with me sticking my finger up her ass.And for reference, I’ve been eating pussy since the mid 70s

Advice

It’s a stigma in public but in private the men do it without issue. To fit in however they pretend that it’s not something they do. The stigma also involved oral sex of all kinds. People are slowly becoming more accepting and you will find different views depending on which sector of the Jamaican population you are interacting with.

Advice

men (not all) lie, deh wid dis ute from a prominant college an him nyam b**** and go down like him life deh pan the line only fi see the same ute next day a bun out man weh naym……its the hypocracy for me

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*translation)

i was hooking up with this guy at a prominant college that ate booty and practiced Cunnilingus like his life was on the line, the next day i saw him protesting about guys who ate coochie

Advice

Most guys i know claim that it’s disgusting but if she wants to go down on them they not stopping her. I really think it’s more of a hygiene thing or they have to really know the girl well enough. That’s just my friends but as other people point out it happens way more than you would think

Advice

I’m new to Jamaica but I remember reading about this phenomenon a couple of times over the years and then some Jamaican girls I work with were talking about Popcaan having to shame his cousin or something for having a video surface showing that cousin going down on a girl. I’ve gathered that it is a thing that most men do but its also a thing that men make fun of other men for doing lol

I suppose I should have phrased it more as a “Is there still a stigma against men who go down on women?

Advice

Yeah it’s definitely a thing in Jamaican pop culture to mock men that do that. It’s in all the songs and “suck pussy bwoy” is an insult. I remember a time when it was a stigma for women to give head too and saying a woman “suck hood” was an insult. Nowadays a lot of Jamaican women do it openly soooo, I just think it’s something that is irrational (like some other Jamaican beliefs/stigmas) and will probably run it’s course

Advice

Think Obeah and what some older Italians called “Blood/Fluid Magic.”

It’s not so much the stigma as it is…what you consume, becomes a part of you. There are men out there who can’t leave women because they went down on her during her cycle. Take notes on what I am telling you. Sex (any form) is a spell…and too many people are sexing low-vibrations, low energies and wonder why they can’t manifest shit. Been broke for a decade and you work harder than anyone? It could be the poor cock you sucking on.

Its a jungle out there….be careful

Advice

Shit I mean I must have been eating that good pussy cause my life been pretty sweet the last few years. In fact there’s a strong correlation between how much pussy I been eating and how sweet my life has been.

Lesson for the younguns out there^

Advice

Jamaica remains as anti-feminist as it has for decades. Strangely, very liberal when it comes to female leadership roles but where most everything else is concerned, it’s the opposite.

I’ve never understood the nuh bow cat or yuh suck pum pum battyman ting a gwaan a Jamaica. My guess would be around 60/40 don’t. The one’s with families or who where raised mostly in farrin do, the others not as much.

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